First I need to vent on a few subjects so bear with me and please understand if this gets to be all over the place.
My first complaint is Jessica Simpson. I'm so tired of hearing about her weight. She looks fine. Now don't get me wrong I don't personally like her I just get tired of the fact that if a staar gains a pound they are considered to be overweight. Not female can be pin thin like the supermodels who are undernourished, or big stars. This sends a bad message to all girls that if they aren't thin then they are ugly. That is bull, I can say this because I was anorexic when I was younger. and all it did was screw up health. The media needs to get over it and let the big stars be.
Next, I feel that no politicion, actor/actress or athelete deserves a millions dollars per movie, game or whatever they think they need it for. It makes me angry because middle class and lower suffer all the time especially now, and they all think they are above all of us.
Finally , I have had so many medication changes and health issues that I feel like I fail with all my family and friends. No matter what I do I feel alone. and this isn't just my depression talking. My family thinks I don't love them, and I do just trying to get myself back to a coping stage where I don't freak out. I went practically 2 weeks without contacting my friends and none of them noticed at all. I want to let my guard down but when I do I get hurt and / or scared so I don't. I have put our family in such a bind that I don't see much of a way out I know deep down there is but I'm having a hard time seeing it. I pray and pray for an anwser and I don't see what it is. How can I give my love to my family when I don't like myself or really know who I am anymore? I'm tired of the emotional rollercoaster and of this bad luck. I'm tired of being told I don't think rationally or logically, and I'm tired of being ignored by what I call true friends.
I'm also going to say I think facebook needs to be shut down. Granted I made a huge mistake on there but when a local 13 year old gets raped here locally by an 18 year old something needs to be done. That site isn't regulated enough. I regret ever having been on there and I will never go back. I hate seeing my friends get sucked in like they are. I'm losing friends locally because of the site because they are more interested in talking to the guys on there that they meet than me. Maybe I'm just angry at myself for being so naive on there but on the computer you can be someone totally different from who you are and you don't know who you are really talking too. It has been proven over and over again with other sites as well as Facebook. A 40 year old child molestor can play like he or she is a 14 year old and get by with it to get mote victims, or an adult could meet someone else from online and think they are meeting a male for example when that person is really a female, or meet someone who may be a murderer. People need to be cautious no matter the site., but from my experience Facebook is the least regulated and needs to get control of its site. (this isn't about any of my blogger friends)
Sorry about the venting but I guess I needed to complain. I've kept my mouth shut long enough on issues I feel strongly about.
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Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Need To Vent
Posted by Michelle at 4:27 PM
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10 comments:
I use Facebook to plug posts ... that's where it ends. The internet is different things to everyone I guess.
My post about Jessica said the same thing. I see models that are rail thin and see no appeal. In retrospect, she has made millions with her looks, so I think she will be ok.
Dawn, first of all I wanna hug you...(((Dawn))) I know you need to complain and you don't need me to say anything about that... :-) I read your complain and lend my ear here.. :-)) I am sorry that you feel that your friends don't care too much to you anymore because of facebook... yeah sometimes it happens... it happens to me too to be honest. I am so into facebook that I ignore my blog quite a bit!
I don't want to talk about facebook here because I will be sounded to defense it hhehehehe.. but hey, I really appreciate your keep coming to my blog and got lot'sa chup!! :-))) I am making something for you...just wait and see ok??
Michelle, as you know by my wife's blog, our son is bipolar. Now my wife is becoming an advocate of mental health issues.
My blog has become popular with several recovery bloggers. I frequent their blogs as well.
I had a near meltdown a couple of weeks ago, but thankfully I got through it and got my depression meds re-adjusted.
I'm not rambling just to ramble. I want to tell you that's it's okay to need help and it's okay to ask for it. You have many blogging friends that are more than willing to pray for you and also come to this site and offer you words of support and wisdom.
Hi.. just wanted to send (((Hugs))). I can get down too... depression runs in my family........and I learned to focus on other things until it disappears.. (and to make phone calls to sometimes just talk about what is going on in other people lives to get out of my own head and thinking).
You have a great day.....spend time doing something special you like. Put the focus on self-love and block out what you might think others are thinking.
Mothers sometimes become the target.. we are the givers; and if we act weak; our families might demand too much of us. Do things for yourself and don't feel guilty. You'll grow happier and others will notice..
(not sure if this all makes sense but has worked in my life).
The more self-respect; self-esteem; self-love the nicer others treat my opinions... and don't play the I don't love them game (my grown children too).
hugs
bettyann
hey vent all you want you should see some of my old rants.Cliff(WixyGrad) said to come for a vist.I hope that you are having a GREAT Day!
So sorry you are not feeling well...hopefully you can get the meds down to a "science." And then you can feel a bit more normal.
I am with you on the celebrity thing....such a crock when someone is being scrutinized by eating...crazy.
on the facebook, not sure if it needs to be shut down, I am not a big fan of it really either. I do think that parents need to regulate their kids though...they need to know who they are talking to and where they are at all times. I snoop. It is the way to go. ;)
I had not heard this story about the 13yr old girl, makes me very sad though. We have to really keep those kids close.
take care,
suz
Hi, I just read Cliff's blog and thought I would stop by and check yours out. I love your site, I love your artistic style. I love the honesty in your share girl. We all have these days. you are in my prayers for better health. Hang in there, I will stop on in from time to time if that's ok.
If you lived by me, I would bring over a basket of goodies - tea, cookies, chocolate and a nice book for you to read! Hugs and good wishes to you!
You vent as much as you like, this is what blogging is really about. We can say what we please, and not get misquoted. We can kick ass and take names ....
I am glad you are feeling better, and shall check on you from time to time to remind you to VENT!
I agree with other people here that this is your blog, so vent as much as you want, especially if it makes you feel slightly (or more than slightly) better afterwards.
One thing I realized when I first moved to Finland is that I had such high expectations of my closest friends. I leaned on them for support, but they were all busy with their daily lives. I realized then that my focus was wrong.
It's really a crazy circle to have your own love bank "empty" whereas other people ask for your love and attention (etc.) and when you need them, they're not there for you.
One thing I did was to find other friends to give me encouragement (so that I had more people lift me up when my other friends were too busy - such as blogging friends) and learning to love myself.
OK, enough talk...here're some HUGS for you...wish you ALL THE BEST in your journey to finding and loving yourself again. Wish I could help more...I'll remember you in my prayers!!!!
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